What if you could feel super all the time? What if you could actually believe you were flying? You know, that awesome feeling that comes rarely and fleetingly after especially memorable moments.
Moments that make you feel like you’re sliding through life like a hot knife through butter.
Moments that can cost as much as buying your dream house or as cheap as feeding a homeless kitten.
Moments that replenish your energy and restore your faith, not only in yourself but in mankind as a whole.
Unforgettable moments like hugging your best friend when he discovers that he will be a dad, or seeing your fiancée after 2 years deployed in Afghanistan — or even banal moments like achieving your jogging goal or beating a silly personal record.
Moments that inexplicably make you feel like you’re invincible.
That deep, strong and solid pump that gives you the GO you needed, like entering that big executive meeting feeling confident about yourself,or solving a once so easily that you want to laugh at your past fears. It’s facing a crowd and delivering a speech like a natural leader and role model speaker.
What if you could emulate this feeling? Could you imagine taking therapeutic doses of excellence?
Finding this miraculous medicine is simple, but of course, like every other medicine, you have to know what you are treating; you don’t take cough syrup for a migraine. What makes you feel confident professionally hardly ever comes from the same source as what makes you feel confident physically.
Generally when we talk about getting things done we face a universal pattern like this:
But here’s the trick; we’re looking for motivation, the kind of thing that we could call inner strength. If you keep this in mind and adopt a perspective of caring more about the inside and not the outside, that universal pattern will look something like this:
Probably it seems all very logical and easy so far, but remember: there’s always a catch.
Remember the question I posed earlier? What motivated you to come this far was the goals, the payment, the fulfillment. You we’re attracted by the good things.
For instance, nobody puts the cost pictures in a photo album; you take a picture from the moment when you buy the house not the moments (the many moments)that you were working for it.
Our mind works just like bugs attracted by the light of the cars and getting caught by the cost, which in this case is getting hit tragically by a car.
Using the same logic, we get caught by the costs, the obstacles we have to face to get what we want.That’s where the difference lies. That’s how we separate the professionals from the amateurs.
This post is all about making you bulletproof to your own personal problems and helping you to find your inner guiding light.
With the cards dealt we can start to play:
We must keep in mind that there will be always a cost; you know it, I know it,everybody knows it. It is an unchangeable universal pattern.
If you want something, you have to pay the price.
We can’t delude ourselves into thinking that all of our wishes and all the solutions to our problems will magically arrive on our doorstep one morning, no effort required. Granted, there are a handful of people who get extremely lucky and win the lottery or inherit an unexpected fortune, but you can’t spend your life waiting for a streak of luck to save you.
We have to be realistic.
2. Approach, or how do you want to deal with it?
Let’s say we are talking about a professional athlete.He not only has to go to work, but he is expected to be the best in his field.What does he do? He trains, and he knows for the whole year, and for the next few years and for all the past years he has been training that this is what he must do to reach his goal.
So how does he face the training?
He simply trains.
The difference between the professional and the amateur is all about approach. While the professional attitude is trying until you fail, the amateur focuses on trying until he succeeds.
The vital difference is that the professional doesn’t mind the cost; he wants it because he knows that pain and failure allow you to evolve.
3. Distancing yourself from your problems
Whatever the cost, whether it is pain from the training, patience in parenting, effort at work, it doesn’t matter because it’s not you.They are just costs. Like an administrator analyzing a cost chart, you can analyze your problems so therefore they are clearly not you.
A lot of times I hear from my entrepreneur friends that, “things for me are always so complex and hard to achieve,” and I ask them why they don’t do different things or try different approaches.
Usually I get one of those unreasonable answers like, “I’ve tried everything,” or, “I don’t have luck.”The truth is that people like to hold on to their problems so they get empathy from others, like their relatives or partners.For instance, “my husband tries so hard, poor him.”
That said; don’t lower your guard, because the most dangerous empathy that you can look for is your own.If you don’t believe me, ask yourself how many times you’ve thought, “everything is so hard for me, I deserve a little break.”
In more unbalanced minds this mentality can lead to dangerous conditions such as alcoholism and drug abuse; “work is killing me, there is no problem if I drink again to relax…”
4. Controlling your reaction
If the last concept felt easy you should be able, during the cost stage, to calmly separate yourself from the problem while it is happening and choose how you will react.
Don’t fool yourself; this takes a lot of mastery. If you don’t believe me, I propose a simple test: break your personal pushup record, and during the last few pushups don’t make faces or sounds. Simply breathe in and out as easily as a walk around the block.
Doesn’t look so easy now, does it? It requires mastery.
Once you have mastered these initial stages you can notably see that your resilience to any kind of problem will be dramatically stronger. In advanced levels of this mastery you will also acquire a passion for challenging yourself, because the more you train (especially the third and the fourth steps), more you will need to keep improving.
It’s just like if you run 2 miles every day at the same pace. Eventually it will get easy and then even boring, and usually you will have to add distance or increase your pace to keep it challenging.
Let’s talk about the last stages, and after you fully understand them, you will not only have a bigger motivation but also will be able to motivate yourself to achieve anything.
5. Understanding the outcome and applying the process, or basically: what do you gain through all this suffering, by paying all those costs?
The answer is simple, is short and it is: WILLPOWER.
You achieve this once you discover that you are not made from paper, and that you are not afraid of the water any longer. I discovered this in martial arts when I’ve found out (the hard way) that getting punched in the face isn’t the end of the world.
Once I was free of that fear, my technique flourished, I couldn’t wait for the next class and my learning rate increased considerably. I took more risks, tried new techniques, and I became adaptable,unpredictable to my opponents.
After I had that epiphany, in the very same week I had a business presentation with an investor to open another supplement store.It would have been daunting and stressful, and many things could have gone wrong.Those that have been through these kinds of meetings know that investors throw every kind of punch at you because they must know if you get knocked down easily;after all, it is their money.
The beauty was that those bad feelings turned into excitement, and the anxiety into a comfortable sensation of feeling challenged.
After I became conscious of the process, I realized I was capable of doing anything at any time.
Willpower is what gets things done.
The question is: how strong is your willpower?